Sunday, September 30, 2007

Advice From a Straight Guy

Now let me start off by saying I'm no expert on women's fashion, but I do know what looks sexy, and I am an expert in good taste. Which is more than likely the reason why many of my lady friends come to me when they want a man's opinion on what they should wear. In the past month or so, I noticed many women pairing cardigans and stylish blouses with high waisted shorts/pants, and I said to myself, now this is how I would want my lady to look. This caramel seductress wears them well, and if you the reader have a shape anything similar to this, run to your favorite designer knockoff store immediately, because this is how you can look!

Wardrobe Enrichment #1

Fall is here, gentleman, and it's still hot as hell!!! But don't let the out of season weather fool you, one day soon you're gonna leave the house without checking the weather, and it'll be 55 degrees and windy. You don't want that day to come without you having an appropriate jacket to throw on. Even if the temp doesn't drop, a gentleman always wears a jacket at night (Write that down), so your still going to need one. These two, from Marc Jacobs and Burberry, will be sure to set you apart from the pack. They work well with everything, and you'll be making a statement all fall long. The Marc Jacobs coat, (on the bottom) is on sale now at Hurry while it lasts. More than likely, your friends cant tell when something is from last season anyway. It'll be our secret. The Burberry boy is still exclusive, so if exclusivity what you're after, he's the natural choice.

Our Very First Top Ten List! (teardrop)

Wow great! Now I can start letting the world know what they ought to love, because when I would read these things I always figured, "Well he/she knows what they're talking about. They're a blogger for goodness sake!" You probably aren't as gullible, but in this case you might want to listen up(audio coming soon just wait) and take notes, because my aim is to make anyone who takes the time out of their day to read this more informed (unless you already know everything I'm saying. In that case just compare notes) about fashion, music, film/television, sports, and of course, women. So let’s get started. Seeing as I just listed a bunch of different stuff, we're going to open up with a general, better yet a Pop Culture Top ten of 2007(last 12 months) list. Just a few of the things that I think was cool/ important during this past year. Let’s Go!

10. The recent string of Jordan re-releases.

It all started two days after my 21st birthday last year, when a limited version of the 5’s was released. A very cool gray and bean-green combo. From there you had the grapes, which I slept on (literally), the burgundy pair, and the forest green pair, both of which I paired with everything from a Burberry toggle coat in the winter, to a pair of board shorts in the summer. MJ didn’t stop there. My very first hero (Well his company at least) went on to bring out a slick pair of multicolored 3’s (I usually stay away from busy sneakers, but there's an exception to every rule) that begged to be stared at, and this past Saturday, the 8's were released in black aqua and concord (Pictured above), as well as a white and orange. All and all, it was the best year in a long time for Jordan lovers.

9. The GQ 50th Anniversary Issue

This one just came out, but it would've been even higher if it wasn’t for the fact that I've pretty much gone cover to cover, and I haven't seen my biggest style hero's named mentioned once! Who is this giant of style I am referring to? Why none other than the late great Steve McQueen, of course! Though I did hear his estate is pretty strict about how his name is used. McQueen omission notwithstanding, this issue has it all, the history, past present and future, all represented in a fashion only the legends at GQ could pull off. My favorite part was the 50 fashion hints that accompanied each of the 50 best dressed men, and as I look it over for the third time, I see my hero on pg 358, and now must reconsider the order of this entire list. Way to go guys. On newsstands now.

8. RapGodfathers.Com

Okay so I barely even listen to current day rap, and this is as close as Lil' Weezy gets to any non hip-hop list of mine (though he would've topped it back in 99-00), but I love the fact that there is a place where I can download as much or as little of it as I want for no charge. Now if there was only a 60's pop/70's soul/

7. The BangBros

A few years ago a friend of mine told me about these porn guys based out of Miami that coerce girls into joining them on their van for a little uhhh... relaxation, only to kick the girls off of the appropriately titled bangbus afterwards, all for kicks and giggles. While this really happens, and it's hilarious every time, a look at one of their more female friendly videos reveals a group of fun loving twenty-somethings (P.Parker is something of a fashion plate) having the times of their lives, and leaving an endless trail of beautiful, satisfied women in their wake.

6. Rihanna’s Bob hairdo

An example of what the right hairstyle can do for a woman. Her humongoid head kind of accentuates it, with some help from those eyes and that smile. The bob is almost as responsible for her success as her undeniable lead single, Umbrella. How long she keeps it is yet to be known, but what we do know is that her new hair has taken her from Caribbean girl next door to bona fide diva-in-training. Look out, Beyonce (Just playing).

5. 50 cent getting all of that money

Whoever told Mr. Jackson to buy into that Vitamin Water Company needs a street named after them. A street paved in Platinum and Ice! While I'm not sure of the exact amount, (some say 400 mil, I heard 100 plus million, whatever) the fact of the matter is 50 is stanky rich, and he's going to die trying to spend all of his money. And I couldn't be happier for the brother.

4. Jake Peavy and C.C. Sabathia

39 years ago, there were two pitchers, one in each league, so dominant that their teams could almost chalk one up in the win column every time they took the mound. This dominance led to them both being named not only Cy Young award winners, but MVP's of their respective leagues. I am referring to the legendary Bob Gibson, and the should've-been-so-much-more, Denny McLain. While their numbers aren't as impressive (specialist pitchers weren't around to eat up innings back then) as Gibson and McClain's were, Jacob Edward Peavy and Carsten Charles Sabathia, especially during the second halves of the season, have been a throwback to the days when pitchers single-handedly kept their teams in pennant races, and you could almost chalk up a win whenever they took the mound. While the magnifying glass on steroid use may have played a role in the way these two have been dominating hitters, what's not up for debate is how much fun its been watching these guys all summer, and soon their trophy cases will likely reflect upon that.

3. Super-Blogs

Somewhat ironic for me to use my blog to talk about other blogs, but how else could an overweight, gay, Spanish man, a bitchy one at that, be a household name in the straight male 18-25 demographic? (I don’t need to say his name) Other than his, there are countless blogs that have made life easier for the masses in so many ways. My personal favorite has to be The Sartorialist. I could look at those pictures of natty dressed normals for hours. Kind of makes me want to go to Union Square and wait patiently, ya know?

2. Celebrity Backlash

Whether its brought upon by themselves (I can't even believe Vick has been getting high this whole time) or by relation (That's just wrong of Sarah Silverman to call Sean P. and Jayden mistakes like that) all celebrities need to be on the lookout for the backlash, because one minute they love you, and the next they're trying to award your kids to the idiot background dancer you rescued from the trailer parks.

1. DVR/Tivo

So what if I'm late! This thing is amazing! Never again will I have to miss a single show. I would never have known the joy of watching quality programming like Deadliest Catch, Masters of Science Fiction (relegated to a 2AM time slot) Catch a Predator, and Kid Nation had it not been for this invention. It’s great, I'm late, who cares!

So I'm Writing a Movie

These days it seems like anybody can get a script turned to a movie (Good Luck Chuck!?!). Think about it, Crash was named Best Picture at the Oscars two years ago. A two and a half hour story about why prejudice is sometimes warranted, but usually awful with ugly ramifications. Way to go, Paul Haggis! Once I realized this I said to myself, Fred, you’re a halfway college educated guy. Got ideas spewing out of every hole and shit, why not you? It was at this moment when I called on my trusty pal Vermis, and said Vermis; I'm writing our story and selling it for a handsome fee! It’s the story of a group of college guys who are at a crossroad in life everyone must reach at one point. The "Oh shit, I'm gonna be 25 one day soon, How will I support myself and my spending habit?" crossroad. What makes our story unique enough for the silver screen is the fact that we live like a colored version of that hit HBO show (you’re not getting my advertisement!) in a world where nobody else does anything close to it. We have literally spent the last four years being the entertainment. An on campus entourage (eh fuck it it’s a damn good show) so to speak. The movie will be called Slaggers (Pronounced Slaggas) and will be completed by mid December. All suitors are welcome to leave a post.